My life is set up between two poles: the city, with social engagements, appointments of various kinds, lots of running around doing errands, and feeling like a small blip in the large apparatus of a major city and the country, a rural setting that is quiet, where I read, write, garden, cook, and live in a relatively solitary and meditative state. This was a week that had both elements. I like the balance, the shifting between these two worlds. I also like living in a part of the country with four distinct seasons. We say four distinct seasons, and yet they really flow into one another. We say “This is the first day of autumn,” but it isn’t like the weather or anything else just flips a switch from one to another. Sometime in August the harshness of summer begins to fade, and the coolness, the fading time of autumn begins. And around Halloween I feel that winter begins its dissent upon us.
For me a big part of that shift involves being outside. In the spring and summer I spend as much time as I can outside, working in the garden. I like being outside in the air, working physically with plants and dirt. It gives me exercise, it gives me time to be busy and yet let my mind settle. Slowly through autumn the number of days I get to be outside fades until at some point they will go away for the winter.
Today I had to get my sweaters out of storage; I like to keep the house cool and so when I am sitting around wriitng or reading I tend to need a sweater. This happened because I was out running errands today, came home and as it started to get dark, I felt chilled. This weekend we return to standard time, and that is a shift as well. More indoors, more sedentary, more inward. I try to remind myself that this is not a bad thing, just a different part of the cycle of the year. And I feel very grateful to live in a climate that provides me with such a constantly changing environment. And I feel doubly blessed that I am able to have two homes to go to, however modest they might be, because it helps keep me balanced. It is important to have whatever control you can over the big design of your life to keep that balance.
I used to feel uneasy over transitions, in season and in my life, but I have come to see that they are some of the most exhilarating times. You can feel that change is coming, can see it happening, and that brings excitement and hope at what is to come.
